Remember the post about the absurdities of UTEP football? It is a living document. Each season brings new ways to list UTEP Football. The two passes intercepted would be quite a qualifier on its own. But add two more from the backup and you have something special. Now you are playing UTEP-ian football in the absurd fashion that only UTEP can play. But! Like let's take it up another notch! BOOM! Bring back the first guy for one more! Now, you have gone on a Galactic scale of absurdity! It is like Super UTEP-ian Absurdity Football! Might I be so bold as to add this?
We are spending millions of dollars to build custom seating to watch this shit! How is that for the King of Absurdities!
I suggest a name change from Miners to Absurdities. Absurdities it much more representative of who we are that Miners. Logo for the helmets might be a goalpost being thrown over the outside of the stadium because we won a game. Or maybe a Miner bent over getting a red hot goalpost shoved up his ass while he gives a big shit eating grin!
How's that new coach working out? Well, he is 1-10, he has two favorite quarterbacks who have shown the natural ability to find ways to lose, another that has been so abused that he medically should not be allowed to walk without bubble wrap around his head, and one more that doesn't have a rattling brain and evidently can't throw interceptions fast enough to get any playing time. Dimel. oh yeah, he's an Absudity. A natural. Who in the fucking world could follow Kugler and take it up a notch? Dimel. Only the UTEP Absurdities could find a way to be even worse than 0-12. Only the UTEP Absurdities could find something stupider than running every play and find a way to be worse. Seriously, it ain't easy to be worse than Kugler, but Dimel has already established his stupidity as being right up there with Kugler's. How many of you would play the quarterbacks the way he has? Raise you hands. Bueller? Anyone? What the fuck happens at UTEP? Does it have its own secret spring of stupid water that is piped into the Durham Center?
By the way, has anyone, the Times Bret, the Prospector, anyone anywhere asked Senter about the job Dimel is doing? I know, it is tough getting a chance to ask him because he is busy firing coaches, But how about the coach of the real sport that everyone sees? That is supposed to generate the money for all of the others? How's that guy doing? I want Senter's words at this point to be on the record.
Build custom seats. I want the names of the dirty sons of bitches that want to pay much more to watch the worst team in football. Those crazy motherfuckers have convinced UTEP to spend millions on custom seats to watch the worst team in football. That is a great qualifier for the Absurdities list!
Seriously. Think on that for a while. Instead of spending the money to get a coach that could win and fill the 50k seats we have, UTEP spends a little, loses more, empties the seats of all but the Society of Masochists weekly meetings at the Sun Bowl, and spends millions of dollars for cushy club boxes to survey the empty bowl and the mayhem taking place on the turf below. FUCKING UTEP! We are the Absurdities.